this i what happens when self realization kicks in.

iam alone.. i am really alone... nothing to call my own except my books and clothes either in boxes or in a borrowed cupboard. i dont have a house and i dont have job.

ive lost everything. everyone that really matters to me have left me.

i really feel like my shitty life never fails to add more disappointments to the list.

you got me through the earlier stages and i really hope i can get through the rest.

i guess i lied. i dont think i can stop loving you even after you said u dont love me anymore.

iam alone now though with nothing.

i guess its self inflicted.

i really feel like ending it... but would it be selfish?

i re read your emails from ages ago i found the song"quiet" by rachel yamagata.

and here i am getting more upset.

sigh.

i wish i can rewind my life but life sucked too when i was younger.

sigh. i guess it will suck more in the future.

bye.